Saturday, September 22, 2007

taking notes at a rwandan wedding

a few things my little sister should think about in regard to her impending nuptials.


have you considered having multiple photographers on stage, while the you and john are saying your vows? they should be stratigically positioned all over, and as CLOSE as possible! i think 8 or 9 (at least) people with point-and-shoot cameras would really capture the moment. oh, and don't bother turning the flashes off, it really brings an air of celebration to the event.

you should also look into buying a 4-octave keyboard (the silver ones with purple keys are the classiest) and have someone (anyone, really) on guard to play a few random chords in between every word spoken in the wedding ceremony. and i mean, EVERY WORD. it works best if you keep some of the chords hanging while you're saying romantic things, like your vows. it has the same effect as an alter-call on television. seriously, the key-board would be a good investment for your marriage.

lastly, in order to make a few extra bucks, you should really consider taking an involentary offering at some point during the ceremony. and, get this, the way you really get their money is to make everyone come to the front and put their money in the same basket, that way, if anyone doesn't want to give you money, they look stupid or selfish. it's really clever. and economical.

please know this sarcastic little instalment was writen with a large amount of fondness in my heart.




ldamoff said...

My sister just recently wed, i made a point of taking pictures of all the people taking pictures at the rehearsal and reception (sometimes there were five or so aunts and grandparents all taking pictures of the same thing). People said i was wasting film but i said i just wanted to remember the even the way it really was; as a photoshoot.

Thankfully the camera people laid low during the actual ceremony.


Mikkele said...

my brother went to wedding in mozambique and he said it was the same way. he's also crazy though- he got people to take pictures of him in front of the couple during the ceremony. the picturs he brought home were actually kind of funny.